Thursday 6 November 2008

I fancy a Jehova's Witness

A Jehova's Witness arrived at the door today and made so much sense that I nearly left home and became one straight away. But part of that might be something to do with the fact that they are employing a new and powerful strategy of sending scantily clad French maids door to door with leaflets asking me if I would like to know the truth. They drop the leaflets, then blush, say "Ooh Msr, I ev dropped ze leeflet, silly me." then they bend over and - I swear to God - standard issue Jehova's Witness frilly panties with the answers to the questions in the leaflet embroidered in the gusset.

I asked her all about God and the possibility of redemption for a hardened sinner like myself and she invited me to her church. This is the sort of dilemma I seem to be facing more and more. Do I prostitute myself, sacrifice my principles, purely for the sake of eternal grace and a place by God's side in paradise? It just didn't seem right, so I politely declined her offer and wished her well.

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